A. In most cases medication is not the solution for hyperactivity. The first question to consider: Is your child really hyperactive or is his environment having an effect on his behavior? I have worked with many children who were experiencing other issues at school such as boredom, learning problems, not being in the right school environment, or the student was gifted, but labeled as A.D.H.D./A.D.D. I would suggest talking to your pediatrician about weaning your child off the medication I recommend examining all of the potential reasons for the "hyperactivity:" Could it be anxiety or boredom at school, a learning disability, result of bullying, fear of failure, or diet-related? There are so many factors that need to be explored and medication will only cover up the symptoms.

Q.  My child's grades haven't been very good.  She seems to be losing her self-confidence.  What can you do to help?

A.  If your child was a good student before, my question would be: why have her grades fallen?  Could she be the victim of bullying at school?  Bullying can cause emotional distress, loss in self-confidence, and distraction from her work. I can help your daughter by exploring the reasons for her shift, work with her to resolve the issue, and give her several inner strength tools for the future.

Q.  Our home is filled with chaos.  We yell and argue a lot and no one listens to one another.  I'm worried about the effect on the kids.  How can we communicate better and have a happier family life.

A.  A calm, happy family life is a goal that most of us strive for.  It doesn't just happen; it requires effort.  It starts with the parents setting an example by implementing listening and communication skills. Parents must lead by using the same parenting styles and have consistent rules and consequences, otherwise children will be confused and frustrated.  Plus, everyone should have their opinions heard, even as young as 3 and 4 yrs of age.  One suggestion may be to institute a weekly family night where everyone gets to discuss their challenges and frustrations without judgment.  Then, everyone can offer sound resolutions. I can help to open up lines of communication and help children to express their fears, frustrations and anxieties.

Q.  My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant.  We haven't any luck after a year.  I'm starting to think it will never happen.  I've been depressed and I'm closing my husband out.  I really want a baby and feel that this is the only thing that will make me happy and bring my husband and me together again. What can we do?

A. My first suggestion would be to have a 'date night' with your husband and share your feelings with him.  Use that time to reconnect.  Your relationship needs to be strong before bringing a child into the world.  Secondly, I would recommend setting up an appointment with your gynecologist to have tests done to see if there is a physical problem why you haven't been able to conceive and also consider any psychological barriers to your pregnancy.  Thirdly, if everything is fine physically and emotionally, you may want to consult a fertility specialist to discuss fertility options.  By having a plan you will find answers to your questions and start moving in the right direction, which should alleviate your depression, especially if you work together, as a team, with your husband.  I have been on the fertility "rollercoaster" and know exactly the emotions you are experiencing.  I am available for support and coaching on this important and sometimes overwhelming topic.

Q.  My son comes home unhappy from school on a daily basis.  He won't talk to me about it.  He just says that he hates school and that the kids are mean.  Other than talking to him and the teacher, what can I do to help him feel more secure and happy at school?

A.  Many times kids do not share their problems and fears with their parents because they are concerned that they won't be understood or that they will upset their parents.  This is where I can help.  In coaching children, I am an unbiased "third party."  I am like a friend who they can talk to without judgment. As I build a rapport with them, I can uncover the reasons for your child's unhappiness.  Then, I may work with him directly, or in collaboration with the parent(s) to solve the problem.

Q.  My daughter is going to graduate from high school this year.  She doesn't know what she wants to do with her future and seems very scared.  What can I do to encourage and guide her properly?

A.  My first question to your daughter is: would she like to continue her education or is she ready to start a career?  If she is unable to answer this question, then she would benefit from life coaching to help uncover her talents, passions and goals.  Through coaching, together we can discover the best direction for her to utilize her gifts and fulfill her passions.

Q. My son wants to continue with his sports activities, but his grades are suffering.  If I take them away so he can focus on his studies, I'm afraid he will resent me.  What can we do?

A.  I would first consider the number of sports your son is involved in and the amount of time they take.  Participating in one sport each season is a good outlet for any child, but sometimes being involved in several teams at the same time, can leave children drained (not to mention their parents!). There has to be a balance between work and play. A child may need better time management and study skills to use his work time more effectively. I would consider other reasons for his poor grades. Sports may be a fun activity, but he may be anxious, bored or having other emotions related to school. I can help provide him with time management and study skills, as well as discuss any issues related to his school experience.

Q.  My child complains of constant stomachaches and seems stressed out about school. She is extremely nervous before tests and exhibits frustration and anxiety. I'm worried about her. What can you do to help?

A.  Your child is no different than many kids today who are feeling tremendous pressure to perform–academically and socially. Children are often anxious about getting good grades on tests, overwhelmed with homework, and trying to "fit in" with peers at school. Coaching can help a child talk about issues she may feel burdened with. Sometimes children see problems as huge mountains, yet once they can talk about them and understand there are solutions to those issues, they feel more self confident. Then, those nagging stomachaches usually go away.